First Heart Anniversary

I was waiting for this moment, it feels like for forever.

Before, I was waiting for the surgery. After the surgery, doctors wait for the 1st transplanted heart beat and then I waited for the 1st day, 1st month, 1st year to pass. It felt like a ticking bomb. Will I be ok? Will I survive? And bam. I am here. One year. One year since that doctor call at 3:30am to hear the news that there is a heart for me. One year ago, since I was taken to the surgery room and I literally had my whole life flash in front of my eyes. To keep me sane I was repeating @jheneaiko the trigger protection mantra on the way to surgery room. I couldn’t keep my emotions..

I knew then.. It was either my last day of my life or the first day of my new life.

All I remember, I was shaking in the surgery room laying naked on the table for a few seconds, not sure if because it was freezing cold in surgery room or because it was adrenalin and shock along together with pinch of fear. Oxygen mask was put on my face and rest is the history.

I started hearing the voices far away, still couldn’t open my eyes. I could barely breathe, I started suffocating, trying to swallow but couldn’t. I was intubated. Passed out again. Then suddenly hearing the voice asking if Im ok. I raised 👍🏻 in the air. I couldn’t speak. The voice said take a deep breath through the nose. I did. The tube is out. And that was the first moment when I took my first deep breath after the heart transplant. I passed out sleeping again.

While I was dreaming, thanks to morphine, I saw angels, one particularly. Standing in front of me like in a superhero pose in the air with one leg slightly bend, chest wide open with massive beautiful wings. It encouraged me to breath deeply and keep breathing with gratitude. All I could hear was “Go. Live”

The first months was rough, loads of emotions and no energy. There is no words to explain the state of the person who just had an organ transplant. It is a lot! Not everyone can handle even the idea.

Those who are waiting for an organ or have been through this experience, you are the Champion. Massive respect for you, no one in this world should ever say anything to you. You are the leader, you are the story teller with your beautiful experience. Use your voice, that’s the least we can do.

Register to be an orgon donor in your country.

🙏🏼