Wholesome

Life is taking over. All day, everyday. We rush, we stress, we strive. Do we stop and think why?

Even after surviving and still living, I fall into this mass. It feels like I am eager to catch up with the time I have lost. The dear time, that is so precious and so fragile. The only measurement we have in life is time. It is something we cannot control, because this clock is always ticking…

My heart failure journey took 6 years. 6 years at the young age to be out of my life. It feels like I lost such mass of time somewhere, I barely remember much from those difficult times. I know back then I didn’t give up. But life really felt truly unfair. In a way thinking I have missed so much during those 6 years, feels like those years I will never get back.

Post transplant, I understand why I was so deep into FOMO. I was torn between “We only live once” and then “I have to rest, I have to respect my body and my mind, I have to take it easy”. Both are sickening. The question is how to keep the balance, right?

And this is still hard for me to apply and live by.

How can you stop or limit when you know you can more, you can have a greater impact, you can improve and you can give hope to others?

How can you stop, when you know you only have few years to live (well, that’s what old statistics say)?

How can you not, when you want to feel that you never ever felt, to taste that you never tasted, to experience that you never experienced?

I want it all, and I want it now, but the fact is the body is leading the way here.

Love

Aiste